The Abbey Girls: Three Generations of Love on Mother's Day

Introduction:

Hey friends! Happy Mother’s Day weekend! This holiday is when I’m reminded of the extraordinary women who have shaped my life. But you know what? We should celebrate them every day, shouldn’t we? Today, I want to reflect on my family: three generations of Abbey girls. There’s my grandma, my mom, and then there’s me. Our family dynamic may not fit the typical model, but honestly, I wouldn’t have it any other way. Growing up as an only child with a single mom and a grandma who felt like a second parent, I learned the true meaning of love and resilience. While many incredible women have influenced my life, these two hold the top spots. Our bond is unbreakable, and the love we share for each other is like no other. So here’s to you, Mom and Hana. Today and every day, I celebrate you.

To Hana: 

Let’s begin by introducing Grandma Hana, the backbone of our family, who raised my mom and my uncle during challenging times as a single mother. Growing up, I always knew my grandma was a tough cookie, but she also had the biggest heart and still does. One of my favourite memories is from grade two, when she went to talk to my teacher because the portrayal of a grandma in a rocking chair knitting in one of our practice worksheets was an incorrect depiction of a grandma! Another classic Hana moment was when she asked Cinderella at breakfast at the Walt Disney World castle if Prince Charming helped her with chores or if he was in the other room watching football. My grandma certainly isn’t your traditional woman! As I grew older, I began to appreciate her wisdom more and more. Climbing the moors based on the Brontë sisters at age eight wasn’t exactly fun, but now, funny enough, I’m in a course where this information comes in handy, and guess who I turn to? That’s right, Hana! With Mom and Hana working full-time jobs when I was younger, Hana's eventual retirement made her an integral part of my daily life. I’ll never forget her making me breakfast and walking me to the bus stop to greet all my friends. She also was a helping hand with my schoolwork and saved me from being the last one picked up at daycare. Thanks, Mom Ha Ha. Now that I'm at an age where I can reflect on her strength and resilience during a time when divorce was uncommon and on her remarkable job raising two amazing kids and working full-time, I am genuinely in awe. Then eventually she had the honour of becoming a grandma, surprise it’s me! Hana always tells the story of how there was a Northeastern US and Southern Canada blackout when Mom announced her pregnancy with me. She knew from then on that I was powerful! You might be wondering why I call her Hana, and no, that’s not her name. She decided she didn’t want to be called Grandma, and since she loved the name and my mom wasn’t using it for me, why not? So, since then, she’s always been Hana to me, and she’d be pretty offended if you ever called her Grandma. Hana and I have always been close. I was her only grandchild for ten years until my cousin came along. So now, she always calls me her "Uno." Over the years, we’ve shared endless good times: skiing in Ellicottville over the years, my first backpacking trip, our 18-hour road trip to Florida, where we pulled over late at night to a motel, drank wine in the parking lot, and listened to her endless CNN updates. So, Hana, here’s to you. Thank you for being the foundation of our family. Thank you for always being my go-to for a good time, serving as my favourite wine partner (especially during happy hour!) and dance partner. 

To Mom:

Let's shift our focus to the next generation: my mom, who most of you know as Hilary. Mom, you are the anchor of this family, and you've done an incredible job passing down Hana's legacy to me. I understand now that you were always hard on yourself, but even in your darkest times, you were the brightest light in mine. Your selflessness is unmatched, and I will forever be grateful for your hard work as a single parent and your unwavering dedication to providing for me. Despite your doubts, you balanced your career as a principal with being a loving mother, always ensuring I was cared for, even on your late work nights or bad days. I had some pretty cool babysitters, and you made sure of that! I'm grateful that you allowed yourself to be vulnerable with me and set realistic expectations for me from such a young age. I witnessed the effort you put into everything you did and the rewards that came from it. I've always admired and been proud to call you my mom. Having a baby and running a school simultaneously at such a young age is remarkable. But boy, did you make up for it on your time off. Yes, there were weekends when you didn't want to get out of bed, but as an adult, I understand that now. However, it was always the best time when we were out and about. I cherished the days when we played hooky and went shopping or binge-watched thriller movies and rom-coms. And the best times were our holidays together, the three of us. Mom was definitely the brains behind these vacations. Sure, we almost got lost in the rainforest on a day trip with a stranger, and we had a close call on a roundabout in Italy in our Fiat convertible, but I wouldn't have it any other way. These memories fuel me and bring me joy when I look back on them. I miss being able to come into your room every night and keep you up on a school night with my funny stories or videos I find online. But wherever you are, I know you're just a phone call away, ready to share a laugh on the other end. I can't express enough gratitude for your sacrifices in order to love and dedicate 18 years of your life to me. The love you poured into raising me is immeasurable, and I can never thank you enough.

Passing it Down:

Last but certainly not least, there's me! I like to think of myself as the Switzerland of the family, always serving as the neutral ground and sounding board. With three strong-willed women, our discussions can sometimes escalate into what could easily be reality TV show-worthy arguments. But they always conclude with a hug, without fail. We've never allowed ourselves to go to bed upset with each other. Regardless of the disagreement, we Abbey girls always have each other's backs. They've instilled in me the actual values of loyalty and respect. Despite our differences, we share a deep love for one another and are made stronger by each other. My grandma leans towards extraversion, while my mom tends to be more introverted, and I find myself somewhere in between. I've been fortunate enough to form two exceptional bonds with them. Recently, we went on a vacation to Cuba, and it was extraordinary to be reunited again. Life tends to get in the way, but that week was filled with love and laughter. Hana and I enjoy our wine and sunset photoshoots, and Mom and I are soaking up the sun with our morning coffee. Perhaps they were both a bit annoyed with me for rolling in at who-knows-what time in the morning, but the best moments were the nights when I accidentally woke them both up, and I found myself sharing crazy stories from the night out. Overall, I don't know who I would be today if it weren't for these two amazing women. Mom is my favourite person to watch movies with, and enjoy takeout on the couch. Even the Disney recruiter told me to thank my mom for showing me "Legally Blonde" at such a young age! On the other hand, Hana is always up for a visit to the city, a history lesson, or both. A few months ago, she even attended my philosophy lecture with me, an experience I'll never forget. Not to my surprise, she had more notes than me. Each and every one of their teachings has shaped my character and influenced my positive outlook on life because I know, no matter what, they're always in my corner. As I embark on my next chapter, living alone in Toronto with my puppy Chihuahua, Moose, where Mom has become GoGo to him, I'm reminded of the significance of family traditions and the memories we've created over the years. I can't wait to continue passing down this legacy of love to future generations, animals and humans!

Conclusion:

In concluding the celebration of the two most remarkable women in my life, Hana and Mom (Hilary), I'm filled with profound gratitude. Hana, the foundation of our family, instilled in me strength and warmth through her resilience and wisdom. Mom, the anchor, carried down Hana's legacy with love, shaping me with her selflessness and dedication. We, the Abbey girls, form a trio bonded by love and laughter. As I move forward, I carry their lessons and memories, ready to pass down this legacy of love to future generations. To all mothers, thank you for your endless love, strength, and guidance. Happy Mother's Day.